Howdy, folks. Apologies for the delay in getting this up and running. I've been a busy fellow since the dawn of the new year and frankly just haven't had the time to sit down and do this properly.
I've actually got some stuff I'm supposed to be doing right now, so I'll cut short the chit chat and just get to the nitty gritty.
While 2015 has come rolling through the gates in (hopefully) happy fashion for all of you, we haven't quite gotten away from 2014 yet. December was a strong month for the CF, as has been the case for the last few months that came before it.
PLEASE NOTE THAT I WENT AHEAD AND DISMISSED THE WHOLE "MUST WRITE AT LEAST TWO COLUMNS" RULE. I STILL FEEL IT GIVES SNEAKY PEOPLE AN OUT TO BASICALLY WASTE A VOTE SO AS TO NOT HAVE TO VOTE FOR A DIRECT COMPETITOR, BUT I WAS ALERTED RECENTLY THAT MIZFAN ACTUALLY WON A COTM OFF OF ONE COLUMN BACK IN THE DAY. I DID NOT KNOW THAT PREVIOUSLY, AND IT KINDA NEGATES MY STANCE THAT NOBODY WOULD EVER DO THAT. SINCE, YOU KNOW, SOMEONE ALREADY HAS.
SO... YEAH. IT'S GONE. VOTE FOR WHOMEVER THE FUCK YOU WANT TO.
By that token, I am technically eligible to win this month and will be voting so as to maintain that eligibility. A dude can dream, right? I've asked TripleR to step in as Potential Tie Breaker Voter Guy since he an ineligible guy with veteran cred and no biases that I'm aware of. If he called you a poopiehead privately, let me know and I'll hunt up someone else.
Before we list the writer folks, how's about a refresher on the rules?
The winner of the Columnist of the Month contest will receive the prize of having one column posted on the main page of LordsOfPain.net
1). No voting for yourself.
2). You must vote to be eligible to win.
3). The candidate you vote for must have posted at least one column in the month of December 2014.
4). When voting, please name both the columnist and, if applicable, the title of their ongoing series in a bold and easily determined fashion. Makes it easier on us old mod folk to more clearly discern the votes, what with our cataracts and such.
5). Main page writers are ineligible to win this award.
6). Please refrain from editing your vote once it is placed, so as to not fuck up the tally. Some circumstances, such as a noob vote for a main pager, are the only loopholes to this one and will be pointed out and handled by a moderator.
7). If a candidate is caught campaigning for CotM, either publicly or privately, they will be disqualified and quite possibly banned.
8). Columns about columns (such as the State of the CF or End of Year CF Awards) are not eligible for COTM consideration and will not be counted in favor of their respective authors in the final tally for the month.
9). In the case of collaborations, all the main writers of the column who wrote the bulk of the collab need to vote to be eligible to win. In other words, anyone who didn't write just a handful of lines needs to vote. If Scott Turner and his partner, Hooch, got together and wrote the epic series, Turner & Hooch, and racked up upwards of 537 votes to take the contest in a landslide, then each of them have to vote or they'll lose, anyways. Ain't that a bitch?
10) You cannot vote for a former main page writer if said writer is less than 2 months removed from their main page stint at the time of the voting period. For instance, if Writer McGee just left his main page spot on January 15th and resumed writing in the CF, he is not eligible to win CotM until the April contest. This rule is included simply because it's kind of stupid to award a main page column to a writer who just gave up a gig in which the point was to post columns on the main page. If they wanted to be on the main page then they probably would've, you know, stayed on the main page.
11). In the event of a tie, the leading vote getters will joust. Nothing fancy. Just joust. BYOH. That means bring your own horse. Either that or I suppose I'll see if TripleR would be kind enough to cast the tie-breaking vote.
12). In the event that the moderator/administrator posting this is also eligible to win, any potential tie situations will be determined by a reliable outside party. If the moderator/administrator posting this is involved in a tie for the win then said moderator/administrator will automatically forfeit and the other columnist will be named the winner.
For your convenience, with great thanks to TripleR, here is the list of the eligible columnists and their columns for the month. If you find that something was left out, just let me know and we'll get it sorted.
List of Eligible Columnists/Columns for November 2014
An American Motion Sickness: The Mazza Cult Tribute Challenge
An American Motion Sickness: Late Night Drives (Five Nights of Cult!)
The Hipster Heel
The Wrestling God presents: PUNK.
Kingzak Presents: The PPV-star of the Year 2014, the Sequel
We Can Be Heroes!
Punk Podcast: An Evolution of Industry?
A Spanish Smackdown! Kleck’s Inquisition
El Gringo Loco: Is Triple H the Right Person to Takeover WWE?
El Gringo Loco: Pimpinela Ain’t Easy review
El Gringo Loco: The Top of the Ladder review
El Gringo Loco: LU Review- Unique Opportunites
The (Motherflippin’) Bright Side is Back: A 3 Day Journey Into Whatever I Feel Like
The Bright Side: Tomorrow Never Dies
The Beauty of Grey
RAY IS WAR: A Christmas Miracle
RAY IS WAR: My Pledge
Detonating Nitro: Episode 11- Professional F#$%ing Wrestling
Detonating Nitro: Episode 12- The Super Bowl of Wrestling
The Devil’s Advocate: The A to Z of 2014 Part 1 (A-C)
The Devil’s Advocate: The A to Z of 2014 Part 2 (D-G)
The Devil’s Advocate: The A to Z of 2014 Part 3 (H-K)
The Devil’s Advocate: The A to Z of 2014 Part 4 (L-O)
The Devil’s Advocate: The A to Z of 2014 Part 5 (P-R)
Sub’isms: Week in Review- 11/30-12/6
Sub’isms: Week in Review- 12/7-12/13 (TLC Predictions, R-Evolution and LU!)
Sub’isms: Week in Review- 12/14-12/20 (Back to Normal!)
Sub’isms: Week in Review- 12/21-12/27 (Lucky 13th!)
In My Perspective: New Year’s Revolution 2006
In My Perspective: Over The Limit 2010
What If It Happened
My World: Ep. 5 “The Reality Era Just Got For Realzies!”
Remembering Kayfabe #1
A “Showtime” Productions : Raw Running Diary
Showtime Productions - Slammy Awards + RAW Running Diary
Showtime Productions - TLC Review + Cena/Lesnar/Reigns Insight
CM Punk to the UFC- Why This Changes Everything
The War-Log #7:- The Rocker & The Master Plan- WWF vs ECW 17 May 1993
The War-Log #8:- The Bomb & The Blondes- WWF vs ECW 24 May 1993
The War-Log #8:- The Kid & The Rick- WWF vs ECW 31 May 1993
The King of Stats presents the 5 Greatest Wrestling Careers at Madison Square Garden
The King of Stats presents the Greatest Wrestling Careers at Madison Square Garden
Wayne’s World: LIVE Running Diary for TLC 2014
And there it is. Here's to a good competition!
Along those same lines, don't forget to send TripleR your votes in the End of Year Awards. There's about a week until voting closes and the more votes cast means the more fair the entire process is. It also at least somewhat justifies all the work that Trips and others have put into the whole process. So vote. For the EOY things and COTM. If you cast a vote here and not for the Awards, you're kinda lame.
Do it. Peer pressure. I will you to vote.
Voting ends on Tuesday, January 13th at 11:59 PM (CST) / 8:59 PM (PST) / Whatever the fuck o'clock :59 (other time zone I don't live in or know about)